It's time to step out on faith and show my face, ive been hiding in the shadows for way to long. I've always somehow managed to put off my living for tomorrow. I'm only just now gaining the strength courage and wisdom to even begin to understand myself and the whys behind the whys. I use the word courage because looking into your own reflection is often scary. Turns out that my faith has always been in the wrong place. I put my faith in people and in things and when those people and things didn't prove to be a sound foundation of faith I crumbled everytime. Each time losing sight, confidence and heart, which was ultimately my own self destruction. Instead of turning the criticism and judgement into a motivation of some sort, I formed a weapon against myself. I had mentally abused my ownself to the point that I even hated looking into the mirror. I had convinced myself that I just wasn't worthy. It's rather difficult to rebuild yourself from the ground up but it's worth it. I no longer walk out the door without taking a long look in the mirror and not for just superficial reasons. I've finally realized where and with whom to plant my seed of faith. Thank you Lord for never letting go even when I did. Although I'm rebuilding one block at a time I still stumble and it's really hard sometimes to get back up. The difference now is the soundness of my faith.
It's time to step out on faith and show my face, ive been hiding in the shadows for way to long. I've always somehow managed to put off my living for tomorrow. I'm only just now gaining the strength courage and wisdom to even begin to understand myself and the whys behind the whys. I use the word courage because looking into your own reflection is often scary. Turns out that my faith has always been in the wrong place. I put my faith in people and in things and when those people and things didn't prove to be a sound foundation of faith I crumbled everytime. Each time losing sight, confidence and heart, which was ultimately my own self destruction. Instead of turning the criticism and judgement into a motivation of some sort, I formed a weapon against myself. I had mentally abused my ownself to the point that I even hated looking into the mirror. I had convinced myself that I just wasn't worthy. It's rather difficult to rebuild yourself from the ground up but it's worth it. I no longer walk out the door without taking a long look in the mirror and not for just superficial reasons. I've finally realized where and with whom to plant my seed of faith. Thank you Lord for never letting go even when I did. Although I'm rebuilding one block at a time I still stumble and it's really hard sometimes to get back up. The difference now is the soundness of my faith.
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